My Stutter (A Poem)

When I was 21, I wrote a poem about my feelings about stuttering.

I wrote this poem in 2019 for an event that was held by the Irish Stammering Association. 

My Stutter

By Bevin Murphy

Very few people know what it’s like,
to have so much they want to say
to want to share with the world
but something always gets in the way.

They feel that the world is stripping them of their voice
taking away their choice
to share their beautiful words
very few people know how much that hurts.

As for me,
I have learned to accept
I have learned to let it be
to give what I get.

I am proud
I am loud
I have no reason to apologise
because every time I fall
 I choose to rise.

There are still days
when my heart wishes
that it wasn’t this way.

That the words I spoke
were not a constant battle
that my mouth could keep up with my mind.

Sometimes I hate my words
how they stumble and bump into each other,
but unlike the rest of the world,
I know my own power.

Some people may wonder,
how I feel strong,
when my words are weak.

But I know I am not weak
I am a warrior
and my armour is my speech.

I have every right to my words
just like all my friends
we are like the songbirds
our song never ends.

I don’t mind my stutter,
it is a part of my soul,
and it will still be there
even when I am old.

But lest I forget,
to acknowledge my strength,
I will remind myself of my breath.

My breath is the thing that keeps me alive,
just like my stutter,
the things that help me survive.

So my fellow companions,
the people who share this journey,
remember who you are,
please keep telling your story.

This is a fight that never ends,
so pick up your weapon of choice,
Me? I’ll use my voice.

We will keep charging the battle ground,
until your voice is found.